Forgive - Trust Can you?

Forgiveness.  When this subject is often spoken or talked about, it is done so under the banner of seeking God's forgiveness for our wrongs. Not wrong, but, it is not the complete subject.  Jesus taught in Mt.6:14, "If you forgive the failures of others, your heavenly Father will also forgive you." We must also seek forgiveness and learn to forgive others as well.

Forgiveness does not mean the instant restoration of trust though. Forgiveness is instant, but restoration of trust must be rebuilt over time. While related, the two are in different boats. Forgiveness is based on grace. Trust is built on works, actions, and behavior. A lot of people don’t want to forgive, because they think if they forgive people, then they've got to trust them again. No. That’s a whole different issue!  If people are in a relationship and their partners are dealing with substance abuse, infidelity, or whatever, they may ask, “Will you forgive me?”  Yes, you forgive them.  But to ask, “Can we go back to the way it was?” No, because what was done tore down the scaffold that enables that relationship to continue as it was. That scaffold must be rebuilt over time. 

Forgiveness and a restoration of a relationship are two different things. Forgiveness is only on your part, whether the other individual(s) respond or not, whether they ask for it or not, whether they even recognize they need it or not. Forgiveness is for your sake. Restoration of a relationship takes far more than forgiveness. It takes repentance, restitution and a rebuilding of a broken trust, and it often takes a much longer time.

In either of these, you have to learn how to leave it to God. Mainly because this is what God instructs us is the wise thing to do. Often though, it is because there are times when humans do not have it in themselves to do it.  God has to become the strength and focus through which it is done, because if it were up to us, we'd but, kill, maim, destroy and otherwise do something that is terribly wrong. Jesus taught,   "Always do for other people everything you want them to do for you. That is the meaning of Moses' Teachings and the Prophets.(Mt.7:12)."  Before being overbearingly judgmental, remember to put yourself in the other person's shoes and ask how you would like someone to treat you if you were in their place. The person seeking forgiveness, must first see that the opportunity for it can be sought from the one they have wronged, and that there is a chance that a relationship can be restored.

• Who do you need forgive?  Start today, before something evil consumes you.
• With whom do you need to restore a relationship?  Seek it today, because today is all that you may have.
• In what ways can someone rebuild trust with you?  Bring God into your heart and life, and let Him be seen in you. Then, the glory belongs to God and He is praised by your life.

Jim